I’ve been listening to my 80s playlist on Spotify these last few days, and for the life of me, I can’t stop playing Voices Carry from ‘Til Tuesday. The song is 38 years old, and chances are I’ve heard it more than a thousand times.
But for some reason, I decided to listen to the lyrics closely and realized that the story conveyed by Aimee Mann, lead vocalist of the band, is as timely as ever.
A story that needs to be told
A friend of mine, Patricia (not her real name), met this kind, very able school teacher at work. He was courteous, respectful, and caring toward her. They got married less than a year after dating.
But just months into their union, she started experiencing physical abuse. It started with a slap after a petty argument that radically evolved into actual beatings from something as simple as not stepping on the car’s brakes in time.
They are now separated but not before a series of disturbing events involving intimidation and stalking.
The timeless video
Voices Carry reminded me of this friend. The theme of spousal abuse and violence against women resonated so much that I decided to watch the music video on Youtube.
In the video, Aimee Mann portrays a woman who is in a successful band. The song starts with a man who appears to be her husband saying how happy he is that the band is doing well but throws a backhanded comment: “By the way, what’s with the hair? Is that part of the new image?”.
This sets the stage for an apt dramatization of an abusive relationship. Like the first words spoken by the man in the video, the conversation starts out much like a potentially abusive relationship; pleasant but then, on a dime, turns sarcastic and virulent.
Powerful words
When Aimee Mann sings the chorus, “Hush hush keep it down now voices carry,” — you ultimately remember the many times women are forced to keep quiet and carry the burden of a toxic relationship for fear of reprisal.
“I try so hard not to get upset,”
“Because I know all the trouble I get.”
The line “He wants me but only part of the time. He wants me if he can keep me in line.” is depicted with the husband forcing himself on her in the video.
A study published in the Journal of Violence Against Women shows that control is the central element of abusive relationships and abusers often use it to maintain power and dominance over their victims.
The sad part is that the same study also shows that women in abusive relationships are held back by their lack of self-worth and deep-lying insecurities.
Aimee Mann starts the song with the line “In the dark, I’d like to read his mind” —
“But I’m frightened by things I might find.”.
Women are intuitive enough to know that there is something that is not right about their partner.
However, an abused woman tends to seek justification for staying in a relationship.
In this line, “There must be something he’s thinking of, to tear him away,” you will find yourself almost resigned to the fact that she is destined to sink in this emotional quicksand brought about by this warped view of the other person’s value.
It’s worse than you think
Unfortunately, Patricia is not alone in this. Violence against women, according to the Philippine Statistics Authority, has not decreased in recent years but has rather been kept silent.
1 out of 5 women has experienced violence from a partner based on their 2021 survey. It also shows there is a lower incidence, but this is because more women don’t report their abuse.
I find hope and perhaps inspiration in the resolution of the video, where Aimee Mann’s abused character finally puts her foot down.
Inspired by a 1950’s Alfred Hitchcock classic, The Man Who Knew Too Much, she channels Doris Day in this one by exposing the husband in front of hundreds in Carnegie hall by calling him out loud:
“He said shut up! He said shut up!” to his great embarrassment.
It’s almost like she was saying enough is enough.
Take a good listen to the song. Voices Carry by Aimee Mann and ‘Til Tuesday.
Take your power back and walk away.
If you are a victim of domestic violence and abuse, please speak to an expert —-
Women’s Care Center 09178250320, 09209677852 and report your abuse to the authorities —- Violence Against Women’s desk at any PNP station and report to your barangay.
