Most relationships nowadays are long-distance relationships (LDRs). Some get used to it, and some have difficulty managing it. Different circumstances and setups exist, but with trust and communication, it’s easier to make it work. The Hack Spirit article shared some tips on how people with LDR managed to do it. Hopefully, they can help you if you’re in an LDR yourself. Check out these tips for a happier LDR with your partner.

Create a vision for the future

When two people are spending time apart, having a shared vision is essential to keeping both of you going when the separation feels too challenging. It would be best to have common goals and aspirations that will give you a sense of purpose and direction. It’s easier to trust each other if you know that you both have a vision for the future.

Set realistic expectations

The problem with having an LDR is that we can have expectations that aren’t entirely realistic. And we realize it only when it’s too late, when a discrepancy between expectation and reality arises. We had to think of every possible scenario: the time difference, our individual schedules and workloads, and our budget. We had to take all of these into account as we decided on our expectations while apart.

Establish open and honest communication

When my husband and I first started our LDR, we quickly realized the importance of open and honest communication. We made it a point to establish a routine for regular contact, which included daily texts, weekly video calls, and surprise voice messages. We knew going in that this would be hard, mainly because he’s a true blue introvert. Even when we were together, he had to have time and space to recharge. But surprisingly, he understood the brief. He got that talking—lots and lots of it—would have to be a priority since we would no longer share the same space. We must adjust our communication styles to adapt to our new situation. So, it really is a commitment. When you’re in an LDR, all the typical challenges surrounding communication will be magnified. There are more opportunities for miscommunication or a lack of connection. By sharing your day, thoughts, and feelings openly and honestly, you can develop a strong foundation of trust.

Address issues and concerns promptly 

In a normal relationship, there are many ways a couple can resolve conflicts. They can hug or hold hands, engage in shared activities, and talk about their problems right away. But with an LDR, you don’t have those advantages. The distance and the time difference (if any) really get in the way of all that. That’s why it’s absolutely critical to address your issues right away. When you already have distance between you, you don’t need another hurdle to pull you apart even more.

Be reliable and consistent

Here’s another vital habit you need to develop to maintain a healthy relationship across those miles: consistency. It’s paramount in any relationship, but even more so in LDRs. Trust grows when we show ourselves to be reliable. I can imagine how awful it feels when you set a specific time to talk to your SO and they aren’t there. Whether you like it or not, doubt and worry will start to creep in, and you’ll begin thinking of so many possible reasons, none of them reassuring. What’s worse is that you’re too far away to really do something about it. So, make a conscious effort to follow through on your promises and be reliable in your actions. This will demonstrate your commitment to a healthy relationship and help establish a strong sense of trust.

Be patient and flexible

Having said that, consistency is important. I must point out that you also need to be flexible. As you both navigate the challenges that come with distance, remember to be patient and understanding. So many things could happen: your partner could be stuck at a meeting and unable to talk to you at your scheduled time, they could have a poor internet connection, and so on. In our case, the one year he was supposed to stay overseas turned out to be two. He had to stay longer to attend to some new assignments given to him. That certainly caused a great deal of frustration for both of us, but we pulled through by adapting and exercising patience.

Practice forgiveness and letting go

And if your partner really messes up? Forgive and let go. Mistakes and misunderstandings are inevitable in any relationship, including long-distance ones. When you’ve got distance between you, bad feelings could fester. Loneliness, jealousy, insecurity, and frustration. Even when you’ve got the best mindset, all of these are harsh realities of long-distance relationships. Choose to let go of those feelings that don’t serve you. With an LDR, you have to prioritize your emotional health. Practicing forgiveness and letting go of grudges allow you to do that. They will enable you to move past these issues and strengthen trust between you and your partner.

Use technology to your advantage

I’m just so glad that we live in an age where technology allows us to stay connected. I can’t imagine how hard it was for LDR couples back when the only means were snail mail and expensive overseas calls. Today, we can talk to our loved ones through video calls. That opens up so many possibilities to keep the spark and trust going! We’ve got instant messaging to keep chatting and sharing photos the whole day. We can do virtual reality dates and synchronized movie nights. Take advantage of all that to build trust with your partner. With so many available avenues for communication, there’s no reason not to stay connected!

Make time for each other

With all of those options at your fingertips (literally!), carving out dedicated time for each other should be easy. And you should absolutely do it, even if it’s just for a few minutes each day. For example, you could set a specific time of the day to talk to each other regularly. You could also go beyond that and keep talking throughout the day as much as you can. I particularly loved it when my husband would share photos of wherever he was, whether he was working at a cafe or visiting a client at their office. I felt so much more connected, and it allowed me to be a part of his day even while we were on opposite sides of the world.

Support each other’s individual growth 

While establishing togetherness is momentous, I recommend focusing on your passions and supporting each other’s growth. You don’t have to put your lives on hold just because one of you is away. For instance, I enrolled in a short course while we were apart. My husband was incredibly supportive, even though it meant that I would have a little less time to communicate with him. He encouraged me to follow my passion and was always there to listen and offer advice. This showed me that he was genuinely committed to our relationship and trusted me to make the best decisions for both of us.